Marriage: More Than A Commitment
“O Holy God, Who created man from the dust and fashioned woman from his rib
and joined her to him as a helpmate, for it so pleased Your Majesty that man should not be alone on the earth. Do You now, O Master, send down Your hand from your holy dwelling-place and join this your servant (Bridegroom) and this Your servant (Bride) for by You woman is brought into union with man. Join them together in harmony, crown them in one flesh, grant to them the enjoyment of fair children.”
— From the Orthodox Christian Wedding Service
Healthy marriages must have commitment and connections between the spouses, ultimately bringing offerings of love that we as people can offer to one another. The connection typically leads to the commitment — and seemingly many believe this commitment, after some form of religious or civil ceremony, produces a marriage. Although this process appears convenient, it ultimately builds upon a foundation which is weak in nature, as it was produced by man. Unfortunately this has been witnessed time and time again, with a lamentable divorce rate of almost 50% in the United States alone!
Christians view this process as temporary; this process leads us toward marriage, and is termed as engagement. Christian marriage is something beyond this process, as it is something beyond what we can build alone and offer to one another. Marriage is only established by God Himself, and it is a great mystery as God, through His Church, joins two people together — placing their souls in union with one
another for all of eternity. Despite legislation or any false sense of egotism, this is something that man can not establish. The foundation is strong, without fault, as it is built by God. God establishes this union only when He may be present and bless all aspects of the union; spiritual, emotional, and physical. After this foundation is built by establishing a marriage, the man and woman build their unified life together, with God’s help, as He heals any faulty building through the couple’s commitment to a process of forgiveness and repentance.
Perhaps if individuals understood this Christian experience of marriage, sad statistics of divorce would begin to be undone with healthy experiences of marriage. When a marriage is reduced to simply the commitment that two people offer to one another, then when the terms of that commitment are no longer exciting, the marriage may easily be abandoned. However, when a marriage is understood and experienced as a mystery that God has established for all of eternity; something beyond human capacity to regulate and control — we become participants in something divine, not easily abandoned.
Please include in your daily prayers all those in the union of marriage, asking the Lord to strengthen the understanding and experience of that which God has established. To God be all Glory!!!
+ Fr. Luke Palumbis